If I weren’t a life-long passionate squash player, not
really caring about the sport in any sense or form, and looking at this from
the outside in, the perpetual pooh-poohing the sport of squash receives from
the IOC would be moderately comical. But since I am a life-long passionate squash player, this unending rejection is
not just infuriating and humiliating, it’s not just indefensible, it’s not just
incomprehensibly dumbfounding, it’s gone beyond the realms of ridiculousness,
gone full circle and into what I can only describe in two simple letters: BS.
In another case of here-we-go-again, reliving the same
familiar déjà vu, squash has – again
– missed out on a spot onto the Olympic program for the 2024 Games that will be
held in Paris. It’s not that this kick in the teeth is bad enough – because it
is – but it’s also what was chosen in favor of squash (and all other competing
sports) to be deemed more worthy of future Olympic glory.
Want to take a guess as to what apparently reigned supreme
over all others? If you said ‘E-Sports’ (Video Games) – you’d be wrong.
Although this one would be more understandable considering the flabbergasting
amount of money that is involved in the industry. Since the IOC has included
“sports” onto their platform such as Skateboarding and Sport Climbing, it’s
entirely clear that the criteria required for being considered deserving for
inclusion have nothing to do with the sport’s actual athleticism, or how global
it is, or its gender equality, but their marketability and their financial capability
– or better put: profitability. (That
being said, I’m a tad surprised the IOC hasn’t made an exception and included
E-Sports anyway).
It keeps on coming back to the dollars. What added value
will the new sport give back to the Olympics? Which doesn’t make swallowing
this bitter pill any easier, because for the life of me the neurons in my brain
go on the fritz when I try to figure out how Breakdancing – yes, friggin’ Breakdancing
– was the cream of the crop that rose to the pinnacle and got the Olympic nod.
I didn’t even know this was
a sport. (Which, naturally, brings into question, what exactly does the IOC
think constitutes a sport but that’s a separate debate in itself.) Nonetheless,
since I was unfamiliar with how Breakdancing would work in an Olympic
competition, the googled explanation is as follows:
“The competitions,
meanwhile, would be referred to as “battles” and feature dancers taking turns
performing dance moves and spins on the floor. Each routine would be graded,
the organizers said, on criteria “such as technique, variety, performance,
musicality, creativity and personality.”
 |
| Yep. Olympic. Looks like one trying to fall down stairs with grace. |
Here is a sample of some future Olympians . You
can make your own determination on the attractiveness of this and whether it
should be included over squash. To be honest, breakdancing looks somewhat difficult,
and there is some level of fitness / athleticism required to do it well I
imagine. But – and you can guess I am asking this with all the repulsive
sarcasm I can muster - is a 3-minute dance “battle” on par with the fitness
requirements of a professional squash match? Ask Paul Coll what he thinks. Is
it more deserving than Ali Farag? Mohammed El Shorbagy? Raneem El Welily? Nour
El Sherbini? … Travesty doesn’t even begin to describe this. It’s sheer and
unmitigated BS.
So incensed at the decision, former world number one Nick
Matthew is calling for the World Squash Federation to sue the IOC. After all,
when Skateboarding was accepted, it didn’t even have a national governing body,
something – one would imagine – would be an important feature that any sport
should have if it were to, you know, be thrust into Olympic stardom for example.
Squash meet all the criteria that the IOC itself has laid out (and then some)
yet it keeps on getting ignored.
I think taking legal action is an extreme and unnecessary
response and no doubt would be a colossal waste of money for a law suit that we
would have zero chance of succeeding. In fact – and I have mentioned this
before – I don’t think squash should bother anymore. I think squash missed its
opportunity years ago. Is it now - for what the IOC is looking for - actually too athletic? Too difficult? The speed, fitness, and length of rallies simply too
much for the average viewer to handle? Unless you are a squash fanatic, if you
are constantly watching points that go on for 90 seconds or so, it’s easy to
lose interest. Things aren’t changing fast enough. The score edges up ever so
slowly. Too many ‘lets’. Squash is not a sport that if you are not familiar with
it, you would sit down and watch it to figure it out – that would take some
brain power and time. Who has the energy for that?
But Sport Climbing?
Watch the clip and whether you do this or not, or have even ever seen it before,
it’s more than obvious the objective, and a winner is determined in about 6 seconds. No need to think, no effort
to watch. Just about enough time before someone flips the channel. But a 2
minute squash rally? I can make a cup of coffee during that time and still come
to see the end of it. Sport Climbing is perfect for the current Olympic
viewership and this is the direction the Olympics is trending towards.
The Olympics is turning more into a circus every 4 years, is
determined to look more ‘hip’ and ‘urban’ rather than keep a laser focus on
celebrating the best athletes in the world in sports that are actually… sports.
The new disciplines that are being included look to be chosen based on
trendiness, youth appeal, and how to keep an audience with the attention span
of a gnat engaged. Breakdancing has “athletes” (I choke just typing that) that
“compete” in baggy tracksuits or street clothes and baseball caps, they seem to
use idiotic, misspelt pseudonyms instead of their real names, and aims for the
highest ‘cool’ factor possible – or if you are on the other side of the
argument, the highest ‘douche’ factor. But if that is what the spectators want,
then squash is further away now from becoming Olympic than ever before.
The Olympics has lost that flawless sheen that
it once owned as the ultimate pinnacle in all of sports: winning a Gold Medal.
In its selfish interest of money and corruption, it’s now trying to polish… BS.
And then sell it off as the highest bar that all sports need to achieve. It’s
not. Not anymore. Squash is too good for the Olympics.
