Hops Challenge – Dec 21, 2016
There is no better way to welcome the Holiday weekend than to (drink) play some tough, friendly squash matches and then enjoy a cool beverage afterwards that – for all worthy Christmas miracles – will end up being completely free of charge! “Who will pay for it”, you cry as you guiltily pour yourself another beer from the keg…? We’ll get to that in a minute.
If you wish to be a part of the squash, just let me know and I will match you up against a fellow member. The result will not mean much except that I will be entering it onto the ranking system, but it is a way to get you sweaty and thirsty and then ready for the ultimate showdown for this year’s Hops Challenge match. The loser of which will be graciously (or not) paying for the keg you are so apologetically consuming. Matches will start at 4pm, we can take a maximum of 32 players, so be quick to register. Singles and doubles available.
Once ‘normal’ matches are completed, everyone is invited to re-fill their paid-for beers, grab a position behind court 7 and get psyched for the donnybrook about to materialize…
“Let’s get ready to rummmmmmbllllle….!”
In the right corner, weighing in at an number that fluctuates between 250 and 270 pounds depending on if it’s a weekend or a weekday, residing in the concrete warzone of downtown Detroit where he chugs raw eggs for breakfast before his 4.30am training runs, coming in with a 2016 record of 33-19, the teeth-gritter-switch-hitter, the earth-quaker-floor-breaker… ZAC – “don’t-make-me-angry… you-wouldn’t-like-me-when-I’m-angry” MACVOY!!
In the left corner, weighing in at an unspectacular 180 pounds, a weight that hasn’t changed more than 3 pounds either way since the ninth grade based on which Nike outfit he has on, lurking in the nose-lifting suburbia of Birmingham where he orders his Starbucks Venti Iced Skinny Hazelnut Macchiato, Sugar-Free Syrup, Extra Shot, Light Ice, No Whip next to the nail-salon, coming in with an extraordinary 2016 record of 70 wins to just 9 losses (does this guy ever work?), the obsessional-squash-professional, the hyperbolic-squashaholic, RYAN – “watch-me-make-Zac-angry” MACVOY!!
|Zac and Ryan. Who will be smiling after this one...?|
Brotherly love has never meant less as these 2 siblings will be desperate to fight for the family pride and the winning acceptance from their elders. Which one of them will be allowed to sit at the main table during the Xmas dinner, and which one will be relegated to the spare room on the other side of the house? Head to head, Ryan holds a commanding lead of 13 to 5, but a couple of those losses still sting and have no doubt left deep scarring tissue on the membrane and Zac has the tendency to raise his game and green up his skin somewhat when he sees Ryan on the opposite side of the court.
Want to witness a “Cain v Abel” type extravaganza? Registration to play is Monday, December 19 (or until full), but even if you just want to drink their beer, come on down and support the gladiators.