The “Mickies”
Awards for 2016
Congratulations to you all! The 2016 squash
program has broken all court usage records, broken the amount of kegs consumed
in one year, broken the record of how many racquets were destroyed, and broke
your squash pro for a number of weeks as well. Thankfully our back-up pro took
up the slack like the trooper he is, although one must question his sanity
after having a full season of handball leagues behind him as well.
So it’s that special time of year when we all
reflect back on our achievements for the past 12 months, and I can
unceremoniously cause some mental discomfort to those who have made the 2016
cut for the utterly valueless “Mickies” Awards. Please make sure you seek out
this year’s winners and salute their dedication to the cause.
The “Upset of the Year” award goes to…
George Kordas and John (JR) Rakolta!

The “Ayrton Senna” award goes to… Vikram
Chopra!
You want speed? Vikram’s racquet head speed
is impressive enough as he waves it around before every shot like a Musketeer,
then whipping it around and cracking the ball harder than most. But his ‘need
for speed’ is mostly satiated with this very unique roadster of his that looks
like a Formula One racing car. Called an “Ariel Atom”, Vikram took this baby to
London, Ontario, for our annual summer doubles day with their members.
I
politely declined the offer to ride with him, I wasn’t in a death-defying mood
at the time. When we had pulled out onto the highway in our ‘normal’ vehicle,
Vikram was already half way to London with Greg Rivard in the passenger seat,
clenching his lower cheeks and doing his best not to lose the skin off his
face. Vikram was not happy having to clean that seat when they arrived.
The “Photo-Bomb” award goes to… Bob
Rogers!
In all seriousness, we do miss Bob who was a
great supporter of the program and was a constant tester of the solidity of our
court walls.
The “Most
Hideously Beautiful Sweater”
award goes to… Patrick Petz!
When it comes to colorful fashion, Patrick Petz
is no stranger. Shame and embarrassment is not part of his world, Patrick is
ready to display anything and everything, rivaling even the most flamboyant ensembles from our good friend Sante
Fratarcangeli. Here we see Patrick in what looks like an ordinary pretentious
Christmas sweater, but on closer inspection you will notice the couple of
squash players posing with their racquets up high. Suddenly, what on the
surface appears to be repulsive, turns into a work of art that every passionate
squash player should have hanging proudly in their wardrobes. Patrick has once
again led the way and earned another shout out for a “Mickies” award.