Thursday, January 27, 2022

SLUDGING ALONG

Boasters League round 4 

It feels like moving through week old molasses while wearing one of those atmospheric deep diving suits (you know, the ones with the metal helmets?) and pushing a block of concrete… uphill. With one arm. And ankles tied together. Such is the speed of which these boaters league matches are being played. Okay, okay, I am being a tad over-dramatic, and we can use the excuse for yesterday’s participation on Tuesday’s election. From what I heard it was a very successful day at the DAC, and celebrations went far into the wee hours, and no doubt the Wednesday morning was greeted with a few fuzzy-eyed headaches. But, believe it or not, we are just about half way through the second half of the season, and we’ve had a whopping 21% of matches completed so far.

Mongoose have increased their lead over the rest of the field, picking up the most points this week with 32, 9 better than next best Foss Nation. It’s not looking very promising for the Wardogs or Nicker Ballers, some dramatic improvement will be needed if they want to give themselves any chance of reaching the play-offs. The Nicker Ballers have the added dilemma of getting the bye week in the final round, so their situation is even more desperate.

All of this isn’t distressing Vivio’s captain Rich Stimson, who confidently announced that his team is the “team to beat”. A brazen if not brave statement considering they are 4th on the standings and currently 29 points behind Mongoose. However, he may not be far off the mark if you currently look at the stats – They do have the highest win percentage – albeit it’s just 0.24% better than Mongoose – and they also have the best 3-0 win percentage, but they have the second lowest number of matches played so far. Like always – and with every team – it all comes down to who will turn and play.

Stand-out performances of the week: Mike Parker (Cadiuex Café) had the quick feet of Haytham Hermiz (Winky-Dinks) doing the double-two-step-tango-do-so-do as he boasted and angled and cross-courted and flicked and hit maybe a couple straight shots as well for his 2-1 win. I think Haytham’s head was still spinning in circles for at least 2 beers afterwards. Alex Parker (Vivio’s) followed in his father’s footsteps as he also recorded a 2-1 win over Kevin Thomas (Over Served) although his game style is a little more traditional.

But without a doubt, accomplishment of the night goes to John Mann who devoured an entire pizza while watching Jed and Vikram go at it. John’s form was flawless, poetry in motion, it’s beautiful to watch someone perform such feats as nature intended.

So, we are getting into the business end of the league season. Keep in mind that only the top 6 teams will reach the play-offs. Time to get busy. It’s also time for another coffee… one with a little extra ‘kick’ maybe…

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