FOSS NATION DOMINATION

Boasters League quarter finals~~

Activity a plenty! The buzz of league finals makes it one of the more enjoyable evenings of the season. It never ceases to amaze me how everyone (most!) players are suddenly available to play on Wednesday, whereas during the regular season, it’s feels like pulling teeth to arrange the matches. I guess it is something to discuss with the captains over the summer: how to encourage regular participation from October onwards, not just March onwards.

Good news is that the quarter finals were decided on the court. Meaning, that most of the matches were completed. We aren’t left wondering about different outcomes (the could-haves!) because half a dozen contests didn’t manage to play. My crystal ball prophecies from last week once again prove that I have utterly no idea about such witchcraft. If I forecast that the sun would rise tomorrow morning – it wouldn’t. So I won’t.

Foss Nation v Butter Nutz

The first result to come in was 14-15; 15-12; 15-14. Brian Rassel (Foss Nation) squeaked past Ryan Covell (Butter Nutz) in what clearly was an epic encounter, worthy of a separate paragraph, photos and interviews, but since no one witnessed this blockbuster, we can only imagine the level to which these two performed. It also set the tone for this quarter final – Foss Nation never looked back.

The rout was on early. Greg Jones, Spencer Roed, Joe Schmidt and Iain Prendergast all recorded 3-0 wins and the only scoring that Butter Nutz could manage at this stage was their bonus points. However, no amount of bonus points were going to make up for this large deficit- they desperately needed some wins.

Mike Jenkins was the first winner of the night for the Butter Nutz. After losing game one to Shail Arora, he steadied the ship to roll out the next two. Scott Beals also took two of three games from John Roarty, and follow that up with another 2-1 win for John Perkins, the outlook was improving, but too slowly. Butter Nutz needed 3-0 victories. And fast.

Jack Bernard heard the frantic calls and stepped up to record the first straight sets victory for their team to give them just a glimmer of hope, They were mathematically still in it but the margin of error was decreasing with each passing match. And the glimmer of hope faded shortly thereafter.

Foss Nation’s Matt Buslepp was having none of it. Determined to stop any more talk or thought of a comeback, he took down Gordie Maitland 3-0. Tony Sorgi then picked up a game from Matt Moore, followed up by Matt’s identical clone Evan, who dampened the hefty cries of “Boo-Yah!” from Dewey Steffen with his 3-0 takedown, and suddenly Foss Nation could start thinking about next week. It was over.

A dominating performance, Foss Nation are looking like a tough opponent. Overall score: 43-29. My prediction last week: “Foss Nation by a hair.” I was right about the winner here, but waaay wrong about the hair! 

Vivio’s v Cadiuex Café

Motivated by my audacious announcement last week that Cadieux Café would be struggling to compete against Vivio’s, Patrick Petz inspired his team to greater heights. Determined to make me look like a babbling ignoramus (not that difficult apparently!), Cadieux Café gave Vivio’s everything they could handle. From start to finish, there was never more than a 3 point margin between the two teams, and the lead changed numerous times over the course of the evening.

Subs would play a part in these results. We needed five, found four, and three of them won. We had one forfeit for each team as well. Surprisingly, Vivio’s only managed 8 bonus points, which for a final is worryingly low. Cadieux Café picked up 11. Would it be the difference? It certainly helped to keep it close. 

The two teams traded wins all week long. A Mark Gregory (Cadieux Café) 2-1 win would be quickly countered with a Rich Stimson (Vivio’s) 2-1 win as well. And back and forth it went. Only 6 of the matches were played on Wednesday – eight of them were re-arranged (2 were not played), so by the time Thursday morning rolled around, no one really had any clue where the teams stood! We would have to wait until Friday morning to find out the final victor here. And it would come down to the number 2’s: Blake Ellis (Cadieux Café) v Derek Aguirre (Vivio’s).

Every match is important of course, but the fact that this one will make or break the season, the pressure was on, the focus intense. In round 6, Derek beat Blake 3-0. In fact, Derek has a solid record against Blake winning ten of their recorded twelve matches. But they haven’t played a lot in recent times. Outside of round 6, the last result was in February of 2020 and, notably, Blake actually won that encounter. Could he go against the trend again? Ummm, no, he could not. Derek seems to be in form and did not concede a game – a good move for his team because if he had done so, Vivio’s would have lost the day. I know there will be some mutterings and mumblings about this overall result: Vivio’s 32 - Cadieux Café – 31. I did predict a Vivio’s win here, but not one that came down to the wire. I got my ‘hairs’ crossed last week!

Onto the semifinals! First we have Foss Nation v Mongoose. Their round 4 meeting was close – 28-26 in favor of Mongoose. Twelve of the 16 matches were completed, Mongoose won 7 of them, only four of those were 3-0, and both teams picked up the same amount of bonus points. So it should be tight again, right? Well, one would think that from last week’s pathetic attempt of being a soothsayer, I would pack up my tea leaves and exit the building, but obviously I don’t learn from my own nitwittedness so here goes… the winner will be… and the team I therefore condemn …Foss Nation!

The other semifinal is Winky-Dinks v Vivio’s. They met way back in round 2, and Vivio’s pulled out the win 32-29. All but one match was played, only 4 of those results were 3-0, Vivio’s won 9 of the 15 matches both teams picked up the same amount of bonus points. Another anyone-can-win scenario it seems. In the spirit of keeping up with my shameless divinations, my tarot cards for this contest are telling me… to stop trying to predict results… not to complain about the broccoli in my dinner tonight… and that Vivio’s will be in the final!

NEVER IN DOUBT FOR MONGOOSE

Boasters League final round~~

During the entire second half of the season, for some reason it appeared to be a struggle to get the boosters matches played. And I found that strange because overall court usage has been particularly healthy. So people are playing… but just not their league matches? In either case, the last couple of weeks were an improvement on the first 7, however as you will see below, the stats are still somewhat unsightly.

The fact that Mongoose ended up on top should not be a surprise to anyone – comparatively speaking to other seasons, their stats aren’t off the charts by any means, they are simply better than the rest of the teams. Conversely, Nicker Ballers position shouldn’t be a shock either. The top six teams that are advancing to the play-offs were pretty much set weeks ago.

Biggest push of the last round came from Winky-Dinks with 47 points which was an important effort as they were chasing down Vivio’s for the coveted second spot on the standings. Their endeavors paid off as they overtook Rich Stimson’s team in the last few hours to grab that spot and be rewarded with a first-round pass in the finals.

Here are the stats for the half. They aren’t pretty…

·         Overall, 60% of matches were completed. Yeah, that’s very low. Up until the start of round 9, we were sitting under 50%. We had 72.5% of matches in the first half.

·         Mongoose won the half with 217 points. In 2019 second half (the last pre-Covid season) that would have been good enough for only 4^th. For the first half this season – 6^th.

·         Mongoose not only played the most amount of matches (66%), they also has the most bonus points by a wide margin – 79. The next best? Winky-Dinks with 63.

·         Two other teams also played 66% of their matches: Winky-Dinks and Butter Nutz.

·         Overall, 60% of the results were 2-1. This is my favorite stat – shows the competitiveness

·         Least amount of matches goes to Nicker Ballers with 50%.

·         Nicker Ballers also had the least amount of bonus points – by far. Only 29. The most players that turned up for them in any given week was 5. If they picked up as many bonus points as Mongoose, they would be in the play-offs.

·         Only 4 players picked up all 8 bonus points. And an amazing 14 players didn’t pick up any.

·         Vivio’s had the best winning percentage with 64%. Wardogs the lowest with 29%.

·         Winky-Dinks won the most 3-0 matches with 20.

·         Only 8 players played all 8 matches. None of the 8 went undefeated. (We had 27 players in the first half that played all 8 matches.)

·         Matt Paradiso (Winky-Dinks) picked up the most number of points for the half with 25.

·         Most points picked up in any one round is 39 by Vivio’s in round 3. Least amount of points was 10 – achieved by Nicker Ballers in round 1 (!).

·         All 16 matches in one round were not completed once. 15 matches were completed just once.

·         Most matches completed in any one round was 79.7% in round 2. Very low.

The quarter finals are upon us! The matches should be an interesting affair:

Vivio’s v Cadieux Café. Nothing like matching up Captains Rich Stimson and Patrick Petz for some friendly trash-talking! These 2 teams met in round 6 – one day before the start of the DAC Classic. Only 8 matches were completed, so it’s difficult to tell from only 50% of the results who the favorite should be here, but on that day, Vivio’s ruled the roost with a comprehensive 25 to 13 win. In fact, Vivio’s won 7 of those 8 matches. I guess it’s not too much of a stretch to predict that Cadieux Café will be in for a tough week.

The other quarter final we see Foss Nation tackling Butter Nutz. Their round 5 meeting was a lot closer: 24-23 to Butter Nutz. They played 13 of those matches and although Foss Nation won 8 of them, they strangely still lost. Bonus points were scarce that day as it was the evening of a big snow storm that kept all sane people at home. This one is a complete toss-up. But, as always, I’ll chuck some pressure on somebody here anyway and forecast a victory by a hair for… Foss Nation. (I’ve probably just doomed their chances!)

CLASSICALLY NORMAL

DAC Squash Classic Feb 10-13, 2022

Two years removed. Covid killed just about all squash tournaments in 2021, and as we were preparing to run this year, we were somewhat worried that Covid would claim us a second time as the Omicron variant was spreading and Ontario was once again in lockdown. Fortunately, the world was starting to open up as the start day approached and although we did not reach our usual maximum number of participants, I’ll take the 137 players we did get any day of the week. 

The worry was that the Canadians were not going to be able to cross the border at all, but with the contingent from London, Toronto, Sarnia, Chatham, and Windsor, we still managed 22 overall as opposed to the usual 40 or so. I was very pleased they made the effort and it was wonderful to see their familiar faces back at the DAC. That’s not to downplay the non-member entrants from the US either which included Chicago and Toledo, Lansing, Ann Arbor, and our friends from the BAC, Life Time Fitness in Troy - without each and every one, the tournament would simply not be the same.

The event felt very much that we had returned to ‘normal’… whatever ‘normal’ is these days I guess! Missing the one year actually felt like we had missed 10, so much has changed. Except the DAC Classic. I try to stick to the formula that seems to work and I hope that all the competitors felt very welcome and at home during the 4 days.

The squash…

In the lower categories, DAC members make up the bulk of the players. So, our odds of winning those categories is significantly higher. In the 2.5, all but 2 players were from inside our walls. AJ Peleman led the way with an almost perfect record to claim the title. His one ‘blemish’ was in the semi-final where he dropped a game to Matt Thatcher. AJ’s opponent in the final was a little surprising to me - Joe Schmidt. Joe had a terrific upset win in his second match taking out AJ’s biggest threat in Paul Gormley in 5 games. Joe’s run continued through the semis with a 3-1 win over Niko Ahee. AJ beat Joe 3-0 in the final, but to place a little perspective into Joe’s effort, Paul Gormley beat AJ last week in the boasters league. Naturally, AJ refused to hand over to Paul his winning Classic trophy… So standard-wise, based on that, one could claim they all are rather even!

Matt Wilson can claim the “Iron-Man” of the weekend. Entering 2 categories, he ended up with 8 matches. In the 3.0 a clean sweep. All four matches were a 3-0, including the final against Andrew Peleman. Matt is another one of our young members that has improved quickly over the past season. Mainly through athleticism and essentially being on court and playing countless matches, he does have an awkward style but so far it has been effective. It will be interesting to see how far he will be able to take this way of plying into the higher levels. We had 26 matches (including consolation) in the 3.0 draw, strangely, only one of them went to 5 games.

In the 3.5, Matt almost did the double-double. All but one of his matches were 3-0. His first round was the anomaly, he beat Tom Fabbri 3-1, and then matter-of-factly swatted away the next 2 opponents 3-0 to once again reach the final. It is unusual for anyone to reach the final of the main draw in 2 categories. If a player reaches the final in the 3.5, what is he doing in the 3.0? This is not Matt’s fault - if anyone is to blame, it’s me. Typically, the DAC Classic would be a stronger field than our club championships based on the non-members that enter. But this year, we just didn’t get as many of them. In fact, all players in the 3.5 category were DAC, and only 4 players in the 3.0 were not. Matt’s 3.5 opponent in the final was a new kid on the block, in fact had just been declared a DAC member 2 weeks before the tournament started - Sean Abelarde. His timing was perfect. I had just received a cancellation in the draw and Sean’s email reached my desktop not 10 minutes later asking if there was room in the same category. Sure enough, I slotted him in, and sure enough, Sean’s first DAC squash experience was a golden run to the title! He stopped Matt’s 7 match win streak with a 3-0 victory.

Now it starts to get tough for our lads. The 4.0 draw had some new players to the Classic, many of them were worthy to take the winner’s trophy. An extremely competitive field, only 3 of our members reached the quarter finals, and only one of them survived for one more match. Dark horse of the tournament was a veteran to the game - Dominic Carroll from Life Time fitness, who actually learnt his squash way back in the day in Zimbabwe / South Africa.  Dominic did it the hard way and maybe - just maybe - he has recovered by now. A quarter final win over our good friend and supporter Jay Nash from London, he then had to turn back the years to tackle a young set of legs from the Racquet Up Detroit crew - Antwan Ramsey. Using all the experience he could muster, somehow Dominic held off the whippersnapper for an 11-9 in the 5th victory. And just a few hours later, he had to play the final. If it was me, just thinking about backing up a match like that on the same day is enough to give me an aneurysm, make me curl up in the fetal position and wish myself off to my happy place… But for Dominic… Bring. It. On. Jeff Wong (Sarnia) was his opponent, and luckily for Dominic, Jeff hardly had a breezy walk through for his semi either. Jeff was taken to the brink by our Tom Howe before squeezing the 3-2 win. Somehow, some way, Dominic pushed Jeff to the limit - although most likely it wasn’t how he would have wanted it on paper - to another 5-set match. But in the end, finally, it caught up with him. Jeff breathed a sigh of relief with his 3-2 win. I bet the beer never tasted so good to both players!

Matt Paradiso continues to impress. In 2020, he won the 3.5 category. Now he was competing for the 4.5. He had a pretty straightforward run to the final, not dropping a game. His opponent in the final was another youthful spring chicken from Chatham – Gabe Van Moorsel. Tall with reach. And doesn’t know what tired means. And too young to drink - which for the DAC Classic can be a monumental advantage! Gabe’s run to the final was not as elementary. JC Tibbitts tested the lad in the quarter finals and took him to a deciding set but couldn’t finish the job. And Gabe had all he could handle against Matt. It was anyone’s match for the taking. Especially when it gets to 9-9 in the 5th. Who can hold their nerve more? Who can frame that lucky winner? Anything can happen. Unfortunately for Matt, luck was not on his side this time around. Gabe was just a couple of rallies too good in the end, negligible really, but enough to take the 11-9 in the 5th win!

The DAC had little representation in the 5.0. All quarter finalists were non-members, and 3 of the 4 semifinalists were from the BAC. Competitive matches throughout however, I can always rely on Brad Steel (BAC) to completely mess up the scheduling and push the matches way back since he insists on playing 5-set matches every time. Okay, okay, his first match was 3-1, but it still went past the allotted time! His semi was against Avinash Gali (Life Time). Similar playing styles, long rallies to length with the occasional boast, less- occasional drop, and the even less occasional winner. Of course, the 5 set match seemed to take all of Sunday morning, one would think they were playing a best of 9 games, not 5, but Avinash ended the marathon 3-2. His finalist was Jack Parks (BAC). Jack had an even tougher morning since not only did he have to play his semi (he won that 3-1 against his club compatriot Zach Edinburgh) he also had to play his Doubles A final - which will be mentioned shortly. The doubles seemed to take a lot of the skip out of his step, and he reluctantly made his way to the singles court. He still put up a decent resistance, but he couldn’t stop the Avinash freight train from winning 3-0. Avinash has been supporting the DAC Classic since 2015 where he won the 4.0 division. Dare he try for the Open in 2023?

In the Open, a smaller draw than previous years, but a strong level. Our 2019 club champion - Stefan Houbtchev - had his work cut out for him to win the category with David Mill (Windsor) in the draw. Stefan and David grew up together in Windsor and have been playing against each other not only through those junior years bit also at college in London Ontario. David has also won the u/23 Canadian championships a few years back, so he knows how hit a ball - hard. Both reached the final without drama. In the first game, it was Stefan who was the steadier of the two, David was uncharacteristically clipping the tin on a regular basis and it cost him. But he found a better line and pace in the second and forced his way back in the match. The next three games had the pace and level that we were expecting from the two, and David was the one who managed to keep his nose in front for the most part. It was a 3-1 win. We hope to be seeing more of David in the near future as he has applied to join the DAC!

On to the doubles. In the C, we had a full 16 team draw. Once again, the most shocking standout here was the lack of 5-set matches - there weren’t any. In fact, there were only three 3-1 results - out of the 15. I’m not sure I can remember ever seeing such one-sided looking results all the way through a draw - not to say that the matches were not competitive, they were just sweeps. Dominated again by our members, three of the four semifinalists were DAC. Rich Stimson and John Roarty were always going to be competing for the trophy and no exception here. They reached the final taking out the Canadian pair of Jess Wilken and Joe Longo to meet up against Jeff Rogers and Brian Ellison. On paper, this should have been down to the wire. Anything but a 3-0, right? Don’t tell Rich and John. It’s not the victory itself that was an upset, it was the 3-0 score line.

Closer matches through the B draw. Local favorites JC Tibbitts and Jason Currie were my pick to reach the final and they proved me right. They had a ding-dong semi against fellow members David de la Torre and Scott Beals - who by the way, made up a t-shirt with the name “de-la-Beals!” - and took a gritty 3-1 win. For the final they had the arduous task of playing Rory Bradd (Sarnia) and Gabe Van Moorsel (Chatham). It was a great match, JC and Jason doing all they could to keep up and for the most part they did exactly that. Overall though, the constant pressure ended up being a little too much to handle and the Canadian pair took a spirited final 3-1.

Doubles A. One of the most exciting draws we’ve seen for a while. Jed Elley and Ryan Covell won this category in 2020 but were agonizingly close to being eliminated in their first match this time around. The team of Max Franklin and Jess Berline (BAC) gave them everything they could handle and then some. At 2-2 and 10-14 down in the 5th it looked all but over. Miraculously, they found a way and came back to snatch victory 15-14! It was a short-lived joy though, they were then beaten soundly 3-0 in the semis by Stefan Houbtchev and David Mill. Peter Logan came all the way from Montana to team up with legend John Seidel (Toledo). The veteran team of the draw, but hardly push-overs. A rusty start to overcome the power of the father-son combination of Kevin and Carter Furmanek in 5 in round 1, they almost upset the second seeded team of Robin Basil and Zach Archer (Chicago) in round 2 to go down 15-12 in the 5th. It’s a thing of beauty to see experienced doubles players execute the angles so effortlessly on the doubles court. We hope to see John again on our courts, he is moving to Colorado later this year. Mark Eugeni (Windsor) is another staple feature of our tournament. He has won our singles and doubles titles multiple times over the years; he has enough steins to open his own coffee shop. His usual partner in crime is Jon Uffelman (BAC) but Jon is recovering from injury, so Mark teamed up with Jack Parks (BAC). Jack is not known for his doubles prowess, but he should be now. Impressive. He’s fast, he hit some wicked backhand angles to boot. They beat the Basil / Archer team 3-1 in the semis, to reach the final. However, it was always going to be difficult against the Mill / Houbtchev combination. Relentless power hitting, David’s balls sound different coming off the front wall. So exhausting to defend against, Stefan and David took the riveting final 3-1.

We look forward to 2023. I am expecting to be back to full capacity - barring any world-wide disasters! - so mark this same February weekend on your calendar. Thank you all around to all the sponsors, all the DAC staff and managers: Rob Barr, Nick Peet, Ryan and Val and all their locker room staff. Shout out to Josh Slominski and Morgan for their help with registration. And to Stu Hadden, our mercurial assistant squash pro.

CRUISING TO THE FINALS

Boasters League round 7 

Not much going on this week. Of course, a major reason for this would be the DAC Squash Classic that took up 4 days of the week, so court availability was scarce at best. Winky-Dinks put in the best performance this round with 25 points and with that, they now have jumped into 6^th position, currently holding on to the final play-off spot. It’s all pretty bunched up from 2^nd to 6^th, but Over Served in 7^th are in reaching distance. They failed to play any make-up matches in their off week, something they will need to change if they want to reach the finals. Mongoose still hold a commanding lead, extending it to 26 points over second placed Foss Nation.

It will be interesting to see if we see a mad scramble in the last couple of weeks. History would suggest that it’s a crap shoot if that happens. Based on how this half has been going, I’m not holding my breath.

Of the handful of matches last night, the closest result of the night was Salam Chaudhary (Nicker Ballers) over Blake Ellis (Cadieux Café). Salam took the match 2-1, but came back from 10-14 down in the 3^rd to pinch it 15-14! Clearly that stress wasn’t enough, Salam immediately took on Paul Ward for an encore and they played for what seemed like hours. Another 8 games? Or was it 10? I lost count.

A bruising affair upstairs between AJ Peleman (Butter Nutz) and Paul Gormley (Vivio’s). At times it was “who-can-hit-it-harder?” as both of them would slam a length, get an opportunity to attack to the front part of the court, but then slam another length. It did make for entertaining squash. I will, however, save AJ from the embarrassment of the complete whiff from a meat-ball in the middle of the court as I will neglect to mention it. I’ll also neglect to mention he whiffed the ball in the next rally as well, just to prove the first whiff wasn’t a fluke. It wasn’t the cause of AJ’s loss in the match – Paul took the 2-1 win. In all seriousness though, it was a great battle.

Paul Huth (Mongoose) gets a special mention this week. Not because he lost his match to Matt Wilson (Winky-Dinks) 2-1, but because of the unending smile on his face. Say hello to the new Granddaddy in the DAC, Paul’s daughter Holly is the proud mum of a new baby boy! Paul is in heaven! We wish them all the best!

Two weeks before the play-offs. I am hoping for that mad scramble… with the standings as tight as they are, every match you play will make a difference. The top 2 teams will get the first round bye, the last 3 teams will be watching and pouting from the sidelines. Keep in mind that March 3 is the deadline to have all of your scores in to me. Once the scores are tallied the morning of March 4, any results that are reported afterwards will not be taken into consideration.

ALL CHASING THE MONGOOSE

Boasters League round 6 

Matches did pick up this week. Not to the level that is needed but it is an upward trend and hopefully we continue to see the rise for the remainder of the season. Mongoose once again is leading by example. They have extended their lead over the pack to 23 points, helped enormously due to the fact they have the most bonus points. As always, the team that turns up the most ends up right at (or near) top of the standings… and the team with the least… well that honor is currently being held by – you guessed it – the Nicker Ballers. And by a large margin.

The good news is that the standings are very close from second to sixth – just 10 points separate them. The Winky-Dinks are sitting in 7^th, just 7 points further back and are presently out of the play-offs. There should be a lot of shuffling going on. Remember, only the top 6 teams will advance and there are only 3 more weeks to go. The deadline for all the scores to be reported to me is March 3 (inclusive).

A couple of weeks ago Rich Stimson proclaimed his team - Vivio’s - to be the one to beat. They were 4^th on the ladder back then. They are now sitting pretty in second. They have only closed the gap by 6 points on Mongoose mind you, but his cheeky prognostication is heading in the right direction for now.

Match of the week must go to Gordie Maitland (Butter Nutz) and Julie Vande Vusse (Mongoose). They split the first two games 15-14 and it looked like they would be repeating the score line in the third until Gordie took a very ungentlemanly turn and decided to take the game 15-13 instead. It certainly was a move that lacked all civility, I mean it would have been the gallant thing to do to let Julie reach 14 at least. Right?

Another entertaining clash was Jason Currie (Mongoose) and Ryan Covell (Butter Nutz). It’s fun to watch two players of a similar level and style run themselves into the ground rally after rally. And, they appeared to be enjoying the torturous running as much as we were watching it. Jason ended up taking the match 2-1, a great win for him as he has only beaten Ryan 5 times out of 16 matches previous to yesterday.

Jake Whately (Wardogs) improved his second half record to 3 and 1 with a solid 2-1 victory over Will Markley (Over Served), and Matt Paradiso (Winky-Dinks) squeaked out a 2-1 triumph over new-comer to the DAC squash family Salam Chaudhary (Nicker Ballers) 2-1. Salam’s deft backhand hold drop wasn’t quite enough to overcome Matt’s youthfulness!

We move onto week 7. The round after the DAC Classic - which is usually quieter but I’m hoping to buck that trend this year. It will be an interesting tournament that starts tonight. We will be missing many Canadians, so the question remains… who will make up for their shenanigans? Who will replicate the Rob Doherty take-your-shirt-off-dancing-to-Michael-Jackson at the dinner / dance on Saturday? Or Gary Sullivan’s all nighter on Friday and Saturday… oh, actually, that will be Gary himself. Gary is coming. Should be a great weekend!!

SLUDGING ALONG

Boasters League round 4 

It feels like moving through week old molasses while wearing one of those atmospheric deep diving suits (you know, the ones with the metal helmets?) and pushing a block of concrete… uphill. With one arm. And ankles tied together. Such is the speed of which these boaters league matches are being played. Okay, okay, I am being a tad over-dramatic, and we can use the excuse for yesterday’s participation on Tuesday’s election. From what I heard it was a very successful day at the DAC, and celebrations went far into the wee hours, and no doubt the Wednesday morning was greeted with a few fuzzy-eyed headaches. But, believe it or not, we are just about half way through the second half of the season, and we’ve had a whopping 21% of matches completed so far.

Mongoose have increased their lead over the rest of the field, picking up the most points this week with 32, 9 better than next best Foss Nation. It’s not looking very promising for the Wardogs or Nicker Ballers, some dramatic improvement will be needed if they want to give themselves any chance of reaching the play-offs. The Nicker Ballers have the added dilemma of getting the bye week in the final round, so their situation is even more desperate.

All of this isn’t distressing Vivio’s captain Rich Stimson, who confidently announced that his team is the “team to beat”. A brazen if not brave statement considering they are 4^th on the standings and currently 29 points behind Mongoose. However, he may not be far off the mark if you currently look at the stats – They do have the highest win percentage – albeit it’s just 0.24% better than Mongoose – and they also have the best 3-0 win percentage, but they have the second lowest number of matches played so far. Like always – and with every team – it all comes down to who will turn and play.

Stand-out performances of the week: Mike Parker (Cadiuex Café) had the quick feet of Haytham Hermiz (Winky-Dinks) doing the double-two-step-tango-do-so-do as he boasted and angled and cross-courted and flicked and hit maybe a couple straight shots as well for his 2-1 win. I think Haytham’s head was still spinning in circles for at least 2 beers afterwards. Alex Parker (Vivio’s) followed in his father’s footsteps as he also recorded a 2-1 win over Kevin Thomas (Over Served) although his game style is a little more traditional.

But without a doubt, accomplishment of the night goes to John Mann who devoured an entire pizza while watching Jed and Vikram go at it. John’s form was flawless, poetry in motion, it’s beautiful to watch someone perform such feats as nature intended.

So, we are getting into the business end of the league season. Keep in mind that only the top 6 teams will reach the play-offs. Time to get busy. It’s also time for another coffee… one with a little extra ‘kick’ maybe…

VIVIO’S SURGING

Boasters League round 3~~ 

From last to 4^th. Vivo’s were wallowing in the depths of darkness after round 2, dead last and hardly disturbing the score keeper. Now, with a bunch of make up matches and a (so far) perfect win record in round 3 (6 matches, 6 wins), they flung themselves into 4^th with a week’s best 38 points. That’s 5 points better than next best Mongoose, who still managed to increase their lead atop of the standings.

So a little better action with the top 4 teams, but not so much concerning the remainder. Nicker Ballers have been very consistent with their bonus point tally – unfortunately it’s appallingly low with just 4 per week. Wardogs have also gone MIA which is surprising considering they won the first half. They have played the least amount of matches so far this half.

It was meet the candidates last night, so we did see some decent action. Not just on the court, the buffet table saw constant waves of attacks, snipers, and raiders. Nothing like free tacos to attract the masses… “Om-nom-nom-nom…”. Server Tony at the keg woke up this morning with an achy arm and shoulder from pulling beers non-stop. It was actually great to be a part of a full court area again.

The on-court action was where the mouths were empty, but the lungs were heaving. Greg Jones (Foss Nation) and Schuyler Hamill (Nicker Ballers) had a looong 3 games. It was almost as if I was watching a video game as most of the game was located in the front two-thirds of the court, lots of drops and angles, but both players would be standing still admiring their shot and waiting until the other one sprinted it down and then did exactly the same thing: Hit it, watch it, wait… then tear off after the next one. In other words fellas… “Get back to the T!!” It did, however, make it entertaining. Greg by the way won 2-1.

Picking up his first win of the half, Michael Essian (Over Served) is getting more comfortable every week. A great confidence booster for him, he managed to hold off Anita Prys (Mongoose) 2-1 and hand her, her first loss of the half.

Brian Ellison’s (Cadiuex Café) match gets a special mention as well, not because of the toughness of the battle against Scott Beals (Butter Nutz), because it wasn’t. Brian won 3-0, the third game a pulverizing 15-1. But because of Scott’s blissful aura despite walking off the court after the match with his backside in his hands. He was in heaven. Why? Because earlier that evening he won his doubles league match against Vikram Chopra and Robin Basil. Of course, it would have everything to do with Jed being his partner, but a win is a win. So delighted was Scott with the best win of his illustrious squash career, he left everything on the doubles court and forgot to take it with him to the singles: his mind, his swing, his racquet it appears…

Into round 4, I expect more results to be rolling in now. (Me, being the eternal optimist!) Clearly my warnings about letting matches pile up went unheeded, which I guess as a married man, I should be used to being ignored. But time will be catching up with everybody and I have a feeling things will turnaround. I also wonder… for how long will Scott Beals mention this epic doubles win every time the conversation he’s involved in turns to squash... or even when it doesn’t? Will squash shoes ever be on the market again? Will my neighbor ever, ever, turn off the lights inside their house or are they actually afraid of the dark? Things to lose sleep over…

A PAINFUL CLOBBERING

Farris Cup - January 15, 2022

Simply put: No. Chance.

This wasn’t even close. Before the day started, I wasn’t exactly brimming with confidence, even on paper the matchups were not overly attractive for us. And as if the task ahead of us wasn’t almost insurmountable enough, we lost our number 1 player 24 hours before the start of the event due to Canadian Covid protocols. Not that it would have made a lick of difference on the overall result, it just would make the score line a smidgeon less disfigured.

Joe Sheena and Paul Gormley

Kicking the day off, we had Paul Gormley against Joe Sheena (BAC). Scuttlebutt on Joe is that he’s a respectable tennis player that can serve the ball at over 110 mph. His squash serve of course is a carbon copy and he did his utmost to drill the ball through our front wall and send it into the back pavilion. Now at the 2.5 level, serving at that pace is a tremendous weapon. It’s difficult to react and handle effectively. Paul did a reasonable job for the most part and once the rally was going, the two had some decent exchanges. However, brute power ruled the day. Joe got the BAC motor humming early and loudly and took the 3-0 win. The BAC never looked back.

While Paul was fending off the bullets on court 8, Josh Gershonowicz was giving himself every chance to even the deal on court 7 against John Giudici. A lot more controlled pace, Josh took one game to find his feet and rhythm, and the second and third were a lot more balanced. Josh was actually leading in those games and it’s so important to convert opportunities when they arise, but the business end of the sets belonged to John, and he squeezed out both of them in tie-breaks. Another 3-0 win for BAC.

It didn’t improve for the DAC. The next 2 singles matches were decided in even quicker fashion. We were now 4 results into the day, and we hadn’t made even a slight dent into the score board. 4 matches to zero. 12 games to zero. My foreshadowing was becoming a reality in a hurry. However, a brief moment of joy relieved the gloom momentarily - AJ Peleman and won his match 3-0! A notch in the DAC win column! Was there hope?

Logan, O'Connor, Mehta, Payne

For a while, it looked like the vortex of despair was creeping onto our doubles court as well. Peter Logan and Joe O’Connor were definitely one of my (few) favorites on the day, but to my bewilderment they were looking down at a straight sets loss after losing the first 2 games to Henry Payne and Mehul Mehta. The glimmer of optimism that AJ had set alight was fading fast. But all was not lost. The comeback was in full gear. Peter didn’t come all the way from Montana to go down in a screaming heap in three. A comprehensive third and fourth game turnaround, the fifth was closer until about 8-all when the DAC team started to string together some points and they finished off the match in fine style. It was now 2 matches to 4… could we make something of this after all?

Ummm… no. We could not.

The singles results were coming in thick and fast. It was complete one-way traffic. It was ugly. Of the 14 singles matches for the day, we lost eight of them 3-0. Plus add on 4 more losses that were 3-1 or 3-2, that’s 12 of the 14. To win the Farris Cup, 9 is the magic number. 

Wins for the DAC were scarce. Our third victory for the day also came via the doubles court. Robin Basil and Ryan Covell have turned themselves into rather proficient doubles players. Their racquetball background no doubt very helpful here, they recognize and execute angles that are unconventional but are also the base of what the doubles tactics should be. Effective being the operative word. They were unlucky not to take their match 3-0, I believe the game they lost (2nd), was 14-15. They deserved the ‘W’, they were the better team this day.

Some other diamonds amongst the rough here, special mention to Jordon Dean. Jordan was scheduled to play at 10am and his opponent was nowhere to be seen. After an exhaustive search by the BAC team, eventually the fellow was found, and he rocked up 2 hours late. Jordan was still very eager to play his match, so I commend his sportsmanship and effort for the day. We were unfortunate not to see the encounter, it was played upstairs, and probably one of the best matches of the day with an epic 5-setter. Jordan unluckily on the wrong end of the result.

Matt Paradiso and Jack Parks

Also, I would like to shout out Matt Paradiso. I am very impressed with his game. He took on a tough opponent in Jack Parks, who can run like a jack rabbit (pun intended). Matt stays very calm on court regardless of the situation, and even though he went down 3-1, I felt that he is more than capable of winning matches of this caliber. A little more experience is needed - it’s not just being more consistent with tightness and unforced errors, some shot choices at critical junctures also let him down. He’s a quick study however, and he’ll will be a better player after this.

All eyes at the end of the day were on the 2 club champions going head-to-head. Even though the Farris Cup was long ago decided, there was still interest amongst the clubs as to who has the top-dog overall. Vikram Chopra for the DAC versus Jess Berline for the BAC. It was a curious contrast. Jess is a smooth customer, flowing technique, clean striker. He knows how to finish a rally, hunts the volley well. However, his movement is suspect. Vikram on the other hand cracks the ball very hard with a whippy technique that can be difficult to read. 

Jess Berline and Vikram Chopra

He likes pace in the game but can be inconsistent with his hitting. He does, however, hold an important advantage in that he moves quicker than Jess. A telling factor at the end of this match. The players swapped games. Vik the first, Jess the second, Vik the third, Jess again in the fourth. But by this stage, going into that 5th, I knew Vik had him beat. Jess was struggling with the fitness and movement. He was hanging back off the ’T’, shoulders were starting to slump, he was becoming flat-footed. Vik’s key was to be steady and patient. He was also tired, but importantly he was less tired than Jess. He needed not to force the short ball but wait for that opportunity. He executed that game plan almost flawlessly and Vik took the 5th in comfortable fashion, and small victory for the DAC at the end of a day that needed some positiveness for us.

Brian Rassel...!

The overall result: 13-4. Ugh. Congratulations to the BAC, we will be licking our wounds here for some time. This being the 17th episode - we started way back in 2005 - the BAC now leads 9 wins to 8. At the end of the day, though, it’s all about getting together and celebrating what the Farris Cup is all about - honoring the late John Farris for who the Cup is named after, and the continued healthy relationship between the DAC and BAC. Breaking bread and clinking glasses after the matches is - in reality - more important than the games of squash itself.

Thank you to all that participated. I just have one more shout out before I leave you. I am very grateful to Brian Rassel for being able to fill in for us last moment after we lost Stefan in our lineup. It’s not always easy to jump in unprepared. So, I guess we can forgive Brian for forgetting to pack his collar and jacket for the luncheon and accidentally bringing his pajamas instead. Very fashionable, mate… very fashionable.

 

SPUTTERING ALONG

Boasters League round 2~~

Definitely a step up from last week with attendance, but that wasn’t exactly a high bar to reach in the first place. Patrick Petz had the perfect motivation for his team to turn up with sponsored shirts to hand out. He had 12 players rock up for their bonus points and a very loud green “Caduiex Café” shirt… makes them look like leprechauns, but so far they haven’t been very lucky on court. Not that there are too many results to get excited about but only 3 wins in 2 rounds isn’t the start one would hope for.

Mongoose jump to the top of the standings, tied on points with Foss Nation, but they do have more bonus points. On the opposite end of the spectrum to Caduiex Café, Mongoose only has 1 loss in the 2 rounds so far – sounds intimidating – but they have only played 9 matches. Out of a possible 32. So perspective is important.

It was great to see our 2019 Club Champion in the house yesterday – Stefan Houbtchev (Nicker Ballers). Stefan has been stuck for almost 2 full years in Canada, unable to cross the border due to the pandemic and he made first appearance in style for the league with a convincing 3-0 win over Ryan Covell (Butter Nutz) . However, it wasn’t all tears and misery for Ryan as he did beat Stefan on the doubles court. We’ll be seeing Stefan and Ryan this Saturday complete against the BAC for the coveted Farris Cup.

Also making a rare appearance was Peter Logan – all the way from where the buffalo roam and the deer and the antelope play, the backstreets on Montana countryside. Where, actually, there are only backstreets, tumbleweeds, and 1850 western towns where it’s never big enough for the 2 of us. Peter is here also to represent us on Saturday, all fired up for a good ol’ fashion butt-kickin’ over them city folk of Birm'ngh'm.

Mentioning other mentionables worthy of mention, JB Peabody (Foss Nation) picked up his second straight 2-1 win of the half over Michael Craig (Over Served). JB lost the third game and blamed his fitness level for fading away at the end of the match. Of course, nothing like admitting to that while you’re guzzling a beer. Julie Vande Vusse (Mongoose) guzzling of the wine was of the celebratory kind as she must have been rather satisfied with her 2-1 victory over Todd Baker (Cadieux Café), and John Mann (Over Served) is a man (!) on a mission, desperate to prove himself after being dropped one spot in the league for the second half. He took care of business with his second 3-0 of the season.

So we were better this week, but still not where we need to be. We need to get matches completed. What will week 3 have in store for us? Will the Nicker Ballers get more than 4 players to show up? Will Evan and Matt Moore start wearing name tags so I can tell who is who? Will the Christmas tree in my living room ever find it’s way to the basement again? Ahhh… the mysteries of the universe…

IF YOU HAVEN’T HEARD, THE LEAGUE STARTED

Boasters League round 1~~

Don’t you love this time of year? The Holidays are over, the weather is nasty cold, the sun sets in the middle of the afternoon if we see it all, I’m sure my driveway gets longer every snowfall when I have to shovel it, and the Lions surprise me every week since I can’t honestly believe they can get any worse but they continually prove me wrong. Oh, and if you haven’t heard, the second half of the Boasters League started yesterday.

Probably one of the quietest league nights I have experienced in recent memory. When the highest scoring team for the week only picks up 16 points, that’s not something to brag about. In fact, between the 8 teams that were scheduled to play, a total of 56 bonus points were collected compared to a total of 39 points scored on the court! I’m sure that catering was shocked to see the keg was still half full by the end of the night!

Winky-Dinks are the ‘winners’ of week 1, atop the standings by one solitary point over Cadieux Café. I wouldn’t read anything into that considering how few matches were completed, but I guess the optics would be a mental boost. Much rather be first, right?

On my walkabouts upstairs last night, I did see the last few hits of the Matt Thatcher (Mongoose) v Paul Palinski (Nicker Ballers) encounter. Paul looked like he’d just came off a Stu Hadden interval track session, sunken red eye-sockets a clear indication of oxygen deprivation… or a hangover… or he was auditioning for the role of Emperor Palpatine in the Star Wars movies… or he’d been crying… Matt’s 2-1 victory may have indicated the latter of the options, but I’m assured it was the excessive running. Matt’s sly little smile also indicated he enjoyed every moment of Paul’s discomfort.

I’m not going to mention, however, bumping into Renée Fershée (Mongoose) as she was making her way to the… (cough, cough… rubs temples…) Pickleball court. Nor am I going to mention seeing Chris Moyer (Over Served) in the middle of his Pickleball match at the time. Because mentioning it may make someone uncomfortable. At least Chris also played his boasters match, so he does redeem himself a little.

Things are bound to pick up – but it will be very important for players to start arranging matches now and not let them pile up. Before you know, we’ll be 5 weeks in, and you’ll have a month left to play 8 opponents.

A DECENT FIRST HALF

Boasters League – Round 9

It wasn’t record breaking, but I’m fairly content with the turn-out for the first half of the Boasters League. Of course, all things considered with the pandemic wreaking havoc with everybody’s life! Surprisingly, we didn’t fill up with the usual 153 players, we ended up 9 short of that. The Wednesday evenings were a little hit and miss with participation, but make-up matches were relatively healthy. I was most pleased that the standings remained close all the way through and the winner of the first half wasn’t a foregone conclusion weeks before the end. As you can see from the standings, Wardogs came out the victor even though Mongoose had the same amount of points. The difference? Wardogs had more bonus points. Other stats to ponder for the half:

·         Overall, 72.5% of matches were completed. No where near the record of 85% set in 2016. In fact, not even one single team played that much.

·         The most frustrating part of the first half was the 5 members who immediately dropped out of the league after the schedule was released. I replaced 3 of them, but 2 teams remained 1 player short. Those teams ended up 7^th and 9^th, a definite handicap.

·         Mongoose played the most with 80%, Wardogs 79%.

·         No prize for guessing the team who played the least… yep – Over Served with 63%.

·         Bonus points also ran to true to form. The top 2 teams accumulated the most. Nicker Ballers the least. In fact Nicker Ballers averaged just over 5 per week… from a maximum of 16. Ugh.

·         Best winning percentage goes to Foss Nation with 59%. They were 7^th! Strangely though, out of all their wins, only 16% of them were 3-0.

·         Mongoose had the highest percentage of 3-0 wins. When they won a match, it was 3-0 48% of the time.

·         Lowest winning percentage was Over Served with just under 30%.

·         Most points scored in any one round was Wardogs in round 1 with 37.

·         Least amount of points scored was Over Served in round 9 with 9.

·         Not once were all 16 matches completed in any one round. 15 matches were played just twice.

·         Highest scorers for the half were Jed Elley (Wardogs) and Paul Palinski (Mongoose) with 28.

·         27 players played all 8 of their matches. Not bad.

·         4 of those 27 also went through undefeated: Will Markley (Winky-Dinks); Paul Palinski (Mongoose); Henry Gembis (Foss Nation); Jordan Dean (Vivio’s).

·         Only 13 players picked up all 8 of their bonus points. 5 of those players were from Wardogs.

·         8 players didn’t pick up any bonus points at all.

 
As I mentioned, not groundbreaking numbers, but all in all acceptable. When 64% of all the results are 2-1, it does appear the parity was pretty good. That being said, I have gone through everybody’s win / loss record for the half and juggled people around. Ten players have needed to be replaced as well. Please understand the aim is to make the league as competitive and fair as possible, and that I have done my best to keep you on your original team. 85% of you are, but with the new players entering the league (some of which are a high level) some team trading is unavoidable, and you may also feel that you haven’t moved up or have been moved down where it wasn’t warranted. I assure you that many decisions were not easy to make, and it is impossible to keep everyone happy. I apologize in advance. I predict an awesome second half to the league, so have a fantastic holiday break and we’ll see you all bright eyed and bushy tailed come 2022!