THE SQUASH POET #8

I can’t say I know too many hip-hop or rap songs, and if I even had an iPod, it would be full of rock from the 80’s and 90’s. So, because I am tone deaf and my singing is akin to rasping fingernails down a blackboard, it would be easier for me to read the Squash Poet’s next rhyme if I had a beat in my head to go with it. (I figure he’s going with the rap angle here…) Maybe someone clever reader out there could put a tune to it? Nevertheless, I still got a kick out of it. 

Finger signs and sagging pants

Backwards caps and rhythmic chants

My Calvin Klein’s for all to savor

Inked up the wazoo, rebellious behavior

They think life’s rough but have no idea

Til they pick up a racquet and a small rubber sphere

And experience the pain of the world’s best sport

The masochistic pleasure of being on a squash court.

The Squash Poet

Try Squash

Combination of agility

The audacity to have ability

Flexibility defying gravity

Versatility for lethality

Capability of terminal velocity

Temerity, ferocity

Activity exclusivity

Captivated into captivity

Feelings are borderline profanity

The intensity is insanity

Man up and grab a racquet

A little black ball and try to whack it

Don’t start to cry when your heart starts racing

Suck it up and continue chasing

Head-butting egos on court collide

A sport of wits and machismo pride

No time to rest cause that’s for wimps

Put on your skirt, return to your pimp

If you’re feeble minded don’t try this sport

You need a spine of granite to grace this court.

Brutality, sweat’s a flying,

Vicious pain, feel like you’re dying

Nasty pace, your muscles are frying

Desperation intensifying

Cruel opponents, don’t stop trying

Wicked power, death defying

Depraved self-harm is gratifying

Devilish fitness magnifying

Racquet skills electrifying

Nothing is more satisfying.

Train the talent with athlete’s class

Have the drive to just kick…

Arsenal is the weapons you wield

Be aggressive on the battlefield

Take the ‘T’ and attack is the trick

Don’t sit on your heels like a useless…

Dictum should be ‘have no mercy’

Kick ‘em when there down, no controversy

Take your rewards as you please

Force your opponents to their knees.

Flick the wrist, disorientation

Opponents grow in frustration

Honing skills with dedication

Creating angles, improvisation

A natural high, buzzed stimulation

Punishing foes with imagination

Run them ragged, suffocation

Move in with style for annihilation

Adoring crowds show admiration

Take the praise of congratulations

Competition is one on one

Athleticism required is second to none

Push your body to the extreme

Mental toughness beyond supreme

Power and grace melded together

Sting like a bee, float like a feather

Velvet touch with lightning speed

Will to win should make you bleed

Only one question, you’ll be brainwashed

Are you tough enough try out squash?

The Squash Poet