Monday, November 14, 2011


Ah yes! Nothing signifies Christmas more than the sound of jingle bells in the background, the merry “Ho! Ho! Ho’s!” of the pretend Santas lining the street corner, images of decorated trees, large mountains of presents, the sweet harmony of carolers, a light powdery snow drifting down in the fresh cool air, laughing faces of young children without a care in the world… and the deafening sound of squash balls thwacking the front wall with half drunk members yelling and carrying on, sweating, drinking, throwing racquets, insults, and obscenities!

The 8th Annual Holiday Tournament is scheduled for Friday, December 2. Matches start at 5pm. If you are interested in playing a lot of squash, drinking a few beers, and receiving an early Christmas present, then take note of the following…

v  Maximum 24 players. We limit it to this number, otherwise you will be playing until midnight, and probably empty the keg prematurely.
v  Minimum 14 entries. This is to justify the keg in the first place.
v  Each player will get 4 matches. This is so you will feel better when drinking all that beer. And also feel like you actually deserve the Christmas gift you will receive.
v  Entry fee. All players will need to bring a wrapped Christmas present (minimum value $20) as an entry fee. If you want to take home a Christmas gift at the end of the tournament, you will need to bring one to give away! At the end of the matches, players will choose their present in order of the final rankings. In the spirit of the holidays, everybody wins!!
v  Banned substances list. Most of the gifts end up being alcoholic in nature (no surprise there!) However, if you are so inclined to be creative and bring something other than rocket fuel, DO NOT be a Grinch and bring anything on this list:

o   Cash
o   Viagra
o   Muffins
o   Potpourri
o   Canary Yellow DAC t-shirt.

All of these have been offered in previous years and did not go down very well.

v  Don’t forget about your lovable, adorable, fantastic, borderline perfect squash pro when buying gifts… hee, hee…

Now the format of the event is unique, but basically everybody gets 4 matches, most likely against opponents of varying standards, no handicapping, each match will be 2 games to 15 points. Players of all levels are welcome to enter. Make sure you register before the deadline which is November 29 or until capacity has been reached.

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